I survived The Escapist's first ever Puzzle Adventure!!

It would take something or someone very special to thaw you out.

Over 5000 posts without incurring moderator wrath. [6 month minimum]

You're the kind of bad guy Shakespeare would write if he was a giraffe.

Got 100% on the Impossible Yahtzee Quiz

You're one bad dude, and are totally going to hell for that.

Solo is for suckers

Aced the Open-Book Escapist Quiz

Has been added as a friend by 100 others.

Is a proud member of the Dance Dance Kitty revolution.

Over 1000 posts without incurring moderator wrath. [2 month minimum]

We won the Webby...because we rule!

Has added more than 100 friends.

Has been added as a friend by 50 others.

I voted in every 2009 March Mayhem match-up!

You escaped from The Escapist's Phantom of the Arcade text adventure!

Created a thread with over 1,000 views.

This candy heart is Rated S for....Simbada-bulada.

Has been added as a friend by 25 others.

Over 100 posts without incurring moderator wrath. [2 week minimum]

Has posted in more than 3 different forums.

Has set an avatar.

For creating a thread with over 50 replies.

Has created a user profile.

Has commented on over 100 different topics.

Has added a friend!

Has been added as a friend.

Has added more than 10 friends.

Has been added as a friend by 10 others.

Has received and read messages from 10 people.

You can never have enough bullets. For when the undead come.

Has received and read messages from 25 people.

I backed one of the fighters in the Escapist Street Fighter IV Throwdown!

Has commented on over 1,000 different topics.

Better Red than Dead! Red Faction!

Has fought 1 battle

Has won more than one battle consecutively

"Surrender Monkey!"

Has fought 10 battles

Has won a battle

Has won 1 battle without the loss of a complete army

"Crush your enemies!"

Has won 10 battles

Has won 10 battles without the loss of a complete army

Has earned more than 20,000 in a single battle

"This is SPARTA!"

Has won 50 battles

Has received and read messages from 50 people.

Has fought 100 battles

For taking the Escapist Birthday Quiz.

Celebrating 4 years of The Escapist!

Completed 5 quizzes and even got some questions right!

Has linked their Steam account on their profile.

Has completed 10 quizzes.

Aced the Easy Left 4 Dead Quiz

Member of 1 User Group

Watched 3 episodes of There Will Be Brawl

Watched 5 episodes of There Will Be Brawl

Watched the Apocalypse Lane pilot episode.

Watched 7 episodes of Apocalypse Lane

Watched 15 episodes of Apocalypse Lane

Watched 5 episodes of Doomsday Arcade

Watched 10 episodes of Doomsday Arcade

Watched 15 episodes of Doomsday Arcade

Watched 3 episodes of Unskippable

Watched 7 episodes of Unskippable

Watched 15 episodes of Unskippable

Watched 25 episodes of Unskippable

Watched all of Metal Gear August on Unskippable

Watched Rebecca Mayes Muse

Watched more than one Rebecca Mayes Musing

Watched 4 episodes of Rebecca Mayes Muses

Has read at least one article in 5 weekly issues of The Escapist

Has read 5 Stolen Pixels comics.

Has read 25 Stolen Pixels comics.

Watched 8 episodes of Rebecca Mayes Muses

Has read 75 Stolen Pixels comics.

Watched 35 episodes of Unskippable

Watched 25 episodes of Apocalypse Lane

Has read at least one article in 26 weekly issues of The Escapist

Has posted in more than 10 different forums.

Has completed 25 quizzes.

I got off the Desert Bus in Las Vegas, Nevada!

Has posted in more than 12 different months.

Watched every episode of There Will Be Brawl

You find these pair nicely with your giant package of underpants.

Enjoyed the contents of the 2009 Advent Calendar

Has posted in a user group on over 30 different days.

Watched 45 episodes of Unskippable

I watched the Series Finale of There Will Be Brawl!

Watched 35 episodes of Apocalypse Lane

Has received and read messages from 100 people.

"See them driven before you!"

"Hear the lamentations of their women!"

Aced the BioShock quiz

Gamers are the new supermen.

I downloaded Issue 210 as a PDF!

Locked and Loaded! Hoo-rah! Join our AVP Battle!

Watched 52 episodes of Unskippable

Watched 16 episodes of Rebecca Mayes Muses

Has connected their profile to their Facebook account.

Member of 15 user groups

Watched 45 episodes of Apocalypse Lane

Watched all 26 episodes of Doomsday Arcade

Has completed 50 quizzes.

Watched 52 episodes of Apocalypse Lane

You're not a master yet, but you're learning.

You could face Voldemort all by yourself!

Articles, comics, forums, videos ... you like a little bit of everything.

Has read 150 Stolen Pixels comics.

You're consistently trounced by a kid and an electric rat. But you keep trying.

Watched 25 episodes of Rebecca Mayes Muses

I chose my 32 in the 2010 Summer E Games Legacy Battle Draft

What you lack in height you make up for in charm.

I voted in every match-up of the 2010 Summer E Games Legacy Battle!

You'd put this badge in your profile, but it just takes so much effort...

The fates have decided ... along with your help.

You wave that geek flag, and you wave it proudly.

Candy! Candycandycandycandycandy!

Candy! Candycandycandycandycandy!

Candy! Candycandycandycandycandy!

Has connected their twitter account to their user profile

Candy! Candycandycandycandycandy!

Candy! Candycandycandycandycandy!

Candy! Candycandycandycandycandy!

Videogame music is cool and all, it's just not really your thing.

Candy! Candycandycandycandycandy!

Candy! Candycandycandycandycandy!

Candy! Candycandycandycandycandy!

Candy! Candycandycandycandycandy!

Candy! Candycandycandycandycandy!

Candy! Candycandycandycandycandy!

When merely winning isn't enough.

Aced our Super Easy Quiz 2010

Has read at least one article in 52 weekly issues of The Escapist

Has watched 5 Top 5 with Lisa Foiles

If you've got it, flaunt it.

Has completed 75 quizzes

Has watched 10 Top 5 with Lisa Foiles

Both stylish and delicious.

Filled out a March Mayhem 2011 Bracket

Has added their Xbox Live gamertag to their profile.

Why can't these dang zombies just let me sit here and eat this donut?

Watched 4 episodes of Anthony Saves the World

Thank you for helping us win 3 Webbys!

Watched the community's favorite Zero Punctuation.

Knows the depth of the soul of the poet

Watched 100 Zero Punctuation Reviews

Watched 50 Zero Punctuation reviews.

Watched 5 episodes of Extra Credits

Earn badges from 5 different Escapist shows

Whatever you do, don't click here.

Welcome to Columbia!

Has posted in a user group on over 120 different days.

Posted a comment using Facebook

Do.Not.Click.This.Button

Shared a piece of content using the Like button

Earned the Sontaran result in the 'Which Doctor Who Villain Are You?' Quiz.

Earned the Catwoman result in the 'Which Batman Villain Are You?' Quiz

Earned the Wolfman result. Watch out for fleas!

Long live the Emperor! You are an expert on all things The Elder Scrolls!

Remember, five second fuses burn down in three!

Has posted in more than 36 different months. Wow!

You've uncovered the 12th Game of Christmas of 2011!

You've uncovered the 11th Game of Christmas of 2011!

You've uncovered the 10th Game of Christmas of 2011!

You've uncovered the 9th Game of Christmas of 2011!

Why are you in a pear tree, anyway?

You've uncovered the 3rd Game of Christmas of 2011!

Before Jaws, there was you!